Here in Northeast PA, a large cross-section of the population has roots in central Europe. This is best reflected by the local PBS Station's decision to program a show entitled Pennsylvania Polka every Saturday evening and the proliferation of Polka Bands at church/firehouse picnics and weddings. The same must be true in Moline, Illinois - the home of this quartet. The instrumental line-up gives the first hint of what's been digitally encoded in the enclosed disc; not one, but two accordians (an instrument that's unfortunately scorned as a musical aberration, everywhere) played by Scott Morschhauser and Barry "The Wolfman" Wolf, saxophones (soprano and tenor) from "Nervous" Neal Smith, and trap set/frame drum rhythms by "Mr." Joel Dick.
These four gents have bent to the task of combining traditional central European songs like Freilach HaShlishi, Peeschoo Lee (fast and slow versions), Freilach HaRishon, the Russian Waltz, and Russian Sherele [I can't be certain these are the correct spellings for the songs, since they're pretty much smartasses - as you'll see] with originals that feature some "Weird Al-esque" lyrics and attitudes.
"Planet of the Apes Polka," for example. They've condensed the movie's plot to 17 lines, summing the moral of the story to: "Our future seems to look pretty funky/If drop the bomb we must/You'll heed my warnings this I trust/We'll have to put the kibosh on the monkeys."
Or, "Death Takes an Ibuprofen." As the reaper watches humans living longer and looking younger, these guys note: "Once the mirror was your friend. Smile now and it's not the end. Your age is causing misery. Hide it with plastic surgery. You can beat it. You can last. Wrinkled gray hair now is past. Losing chess with Igmar Bergman. Look it's death taking an ibuprofen."
The "BunzuvSteil Polka" is a lament about what happened to the narrators home life after his wife got "bunzuvsteil" - "There's men lined up around the block/I point my ears like Mr. Spock/To hear these dogs bark/like a wiskered seal./I can't believe this frightning view/They're like caged lions at the zoo/Since my baby got the bunzuvsteil."
And then there's "Get Maj!" which starts as a dirge, then asks, "What do you think you're soaking in? *male voiceover: Relax, it's Palm Olive... What do you think you're soaking in? *female voiceover: Is it mild?... Male voiceover: More than just mild, it soften your hands while you do the dishes!... *female voiceover: Dishwashing loation!?..." [this ends side one] followed by - before it was cool - the theme from "Underdog."
There is one "serious" song amongst the 18, "Wall Marrt Polkaa." It warns against the homogenization of small towns by chain stores; "My home town was famous for Italian restaurants. The mom and pop eateries and the lucious food they'd flaunt. Now the restaurant chains have become the local haunts. They're serving up the bland and this is what you want? Local business, local profits that's what makes us all smart. It's not worth the lousy service. Why don't you do your part?"
If you dislike accordians, then stay as far away from these guys as you can. But, if (like me) you're a fan of Weird Al and 3Mustaphas3 this is a worthy addition to your collection. And, according to the manufacturer, this Lepp*o*phonic Long Play Stereo Microgroove disc may be played on monophonic reproducers without any adverse effect on the disc or playback system. But, they warn, the full dimension of binaural sound will only be recreated on a properly equipped hi-fi system, matched with a pair of stereophonic speakers. Purchasers are assured that because the recording is fully compatible, there's no need to fear it becoming obsolete in the future...
These truely indie, madcap musicians can be contacted on the World Wide Web at http://www.panix.com/~vision/kabalas.html
